What to do when you’re trapped in the life of your own creation?
Have you ever looked around at the life you’re living and wonder how on earth you got there? When you look around you realize that this is not at all what you thought you were signing up for and looking in the mirror is like looking into the eyes of a stranger. For many people this can bring anxiety, depression and even symptoms felt physically with it. I found myself in this place as a 30-year-old that was raising three children. I was married, living in a home that was custom built, two new cars in the driveway, living what was supposed to be “the dream.” Except I didn’t recognize myself and every day I was just going through the motions just to make it to the next day, having no idea what I was supposed to be doing for the rest of my life.
The desire for more, for something different is your Soul calling out to you, begging for your attention. Stop, and listen you won’t regret it!
The good news is that there is hope – hope for change and the ability to create a life that you love!
Step One – Choice
From this place, the first question to ask yourself is who is making your choices? Are you making choices everyday to serve yourself and the world, or are you fulfilling someone else’s idea of who you should be. Whatever your answer to this is, the first step is to realize and own the fact that everyday you make the choices that create your reality. That’s right ~ All along the way you were the one that was making choices. Whether it was the decision to do what others wanted you to do, to fulfill their expectations of you or just going with the programming of society. Even the decision to not make a choice is still making a choice.
Choice was a gift given to us at birth, so that we could create a reality that would serve us to the greatest capacity. From this place of understanding that we are creating our own reality, the only limitations are the ones that you choose to believe.
If you’re looking around at your life now and deciding that it’s not what you actually desire to create, even if from the outside it looks pretty darn good – it’s ok, give yourself permission to be unhappy with what you’ve created.
Step Two – Willingness to Make Mistakes and be Wrong.
Even if you’ve agreed to all of the decisions previously that got you to where you are now. Making mistakes in life is required to learn and grow, just so long as you are learning and growing along the way. Sometimes the only real way to know what we want is try out different options and see where that takes us. If it turns out that it wasn’t the right choice for us then it was good research, and we then have an ability to choose something new and see where that takes us. Often times the fear of making a mistake or being wrong will hold us back from the ability to achieve the greatness that we are destined for. Go ahead, try something out and if it’s not right for you then just make a different choice and learn and grow along the way. In the end this will be far easier than attempting to maintain an unsatisfying lifestyle for the next “X” number of years.
Step 3 – Owning your Journey
Even though you may have agreed to it earlier doesn’t mean that you’re stuck with it now. You don’t owe it to anyone to meet their expectations of you. That’s on them; they own that piece – not you. So, your parents wanted you to become an accountant and you did except every day that you go to work, it feels like the worst thing there is.
You owe it to your self to seek out your Joy in life, that is where the magick is. Many people are sacrificing their own life experiences in order to fit into the expectation that has been set out before them, whether by their parents, their partners, society, etc. You don’t owe this to anyone. The only ownership you have is over your self, your choices, your experiences. No one has this power over you, unless you allow them to. This is the time for you to re-claim your divine power and step into the life that you were meant to life. This may seem impossible up front, but remember you don’t own someone else’s disappointment, that piece stays with them. Another person’s vision of us isn’t about us at all actually, it’s only ever about them and their understanding of themselves and their purpose in life.
True joy is found within; discovery of this is your responsibility and your destiny. This is not dependent on how you were raised, how you are treated by your friends and family, this rests solely within you. It is your gift to discover and bring forth in the world.
Step 4 – Step into the Fear
Are you afraid of making the wrong decision, or even scared of what it would mean to move fully into alignment with your life’s purpose? Be willing to lean into the fear, whatever it may be. Once you do this and are finally able to see from the other side of the fear, that maybe it wasn’t nearly as bad as you thought it would be. The next time that you’re in this place it will be little easier to take that step, and the next and the next. Pretty soon you may discover that fear no longer leads you, but the faith in yourself will be guiding the way. Often times our greatest accomplishments exist on the other side of what we fear the most. Without our willingness to move through the fear this greatness will remain undiscovered.
Step 5 – Discovery
This piece is all on you. Who are you? Who are you outside of who you were told to be? Who are you outside of all of the expectation? Who are you really, and what are you here on earth to accomplish? Once you understand this and integrate this into all aspects of you, the purest of happiness – what we call Joy, is all yours! An empowering piece to understand is that it’s no one else’s responsibility to ensure your happiness. That is your duty to yourself and no one in the world no matter who they are or how they make you feel can do that for you. It is not another person’s responsibility to complete you, this is all you. The people in our life can either add to our Joy or attempt to interfere with it, but NO ONE else can be responsible for our experience with Joy.
Step 6 – Make a Map of your Future
Sit down the old-fashioned way with a paper and pen and make a map of all of the things that you want to experience in this life time. I’m not talking about a ‘bucket list’ here but rather all of the bits and pieces of what you want your life to look like and possible ways to accomplish this. Nothing is too big or too small to be considered. You may even run into a few things that you know that you want but aren’t too sure how to achieve it. Great, this is the fun part ~ this is the magick! All of the experiences that you gain, by doing what’s necessary to accomplish these aspects will help you expand and grow more than you thought was possible. Lay it all out here so you can see it with no limitations, even if it feels too big or impossible. Be willing to map it out and allow room for the possibility of it to be true for you and see where that takes you. Who knows, maybe you’ll be bringing it all into reality in no time!
Step 7 – Be your own Hero
This requires action: You must be willing to take action in the physical in order to be able to achieve your desires. It’s not enough to want something different, or to just make a plan. It will take action in the physical in order to make changes in your physical world. What would it take to create the life of your dreams and make it a reality? What will you need to let go of in order to achieve and what new skills will you need to cultivate?
Taking the required action in order to achieve your dreams will take you on quite an adventure with you as the hero in your own story. There is no limit to what we can accomplish in this lifetime, the only limits are what we perceive them to be. Push past this and you can achieve greatness!
Step 8 – Focus on Joy and Love
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not suggesting that you never have to do another thing in life if you don’t love it or it doesn’t bring you Joy. But what I am saying is that these two qualities should really be your main focus in life. Sometimes we need to continue to do things even if it doesn’t fit these parameters. Cleaning for me is just a necessity that I look after. I don’t love it, but I do receive pleasure from the outcome, so I continue cleaning.
What I am saying here is that the aspects of your life that do not bring you Joy, and you don’t love, you have the opportunity to change these things. Have the courage to really look at all the aspects of your life and decide: do you love it, and does it bring you joy? Your career or job for instance: do you dread or look forward to a day’s work? If you’re always looking towards the start of a work week with dread, what would it take for you to make the changes necessary so that you would love your career? Uncover what you are passionate about. Dig into what makes your heart sing. What would you do on a daily basis if you could do anything you want?
In my life the effort was totally worth it. I was able to make changes on all levels in order to bring Love and Joy into all aspects of my life and the lives of my children. My Journey to “Know Thyself” has been a journey to freedom for me. A journey of clarity, empowerment, excitement and Joy. The guiding light for me was what I learned and gained from my experience with The Modern Mystery School, starting with my Life Activation as well as my Initiation into the Lineage of King Salomon. These two things along with faith in myself and the desire to live a fulfilling life have taken me many places and into new territory on all levels. Through this adventure I re-discovered Joy and True Love.
If you’re ready to impart on your own journey, reach out I would be happy to help!